Self-Compassion - Dr Sangeetha Madhu and Sanjhna Shetty

According to the American Psychological Association, “Self-compassion is a construct derived from Buddhist thought and entailing a non-critical stance toward one’s inadequacies and failures.” Being kind to oneself, confronting insecurities, and embracing one’s good bad and ugly is an essential aspect of self-compassion. We live in a society where self-criticism is regarded as a factor of growth whereas showing warmth and kindness to ourselves signifies weakness.

Three elements of Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is often interchangeably used with self-esteem. While self-esteem is related to the evaluation of oneself. self-compassion has to do with self-acceptance, even when there is failure. While engaging in the practice of self-compassion, there are three elements consistently present:

1.      Self-kindness: As the name implies, self-kindness refers to showing oneself the same amount of kindness one would show others

2.      Common Humanity: Acknowledging that each one of us is a human and being human is not an easy job

3.      Mindfulness: Observing one’s experiences with equilibrium state of mind. This element believes in being non-judgmental as well as accepting pain before being compassionate

Ways to develop self-compassion

Being gentle, kind and accepting of who we are can be a daunting task to some of us. To understand that one is capable of growth and is full of potential is a process. Following are some of the ways to develop self-compassion:

1.      Learning to forgive oneself and not being too critical about one’s mistakes

2.      Having a growth mindset which involves embracing challenges instead of avoiding them and believing in oneself

3.      Expressing gratitude and being generous, in a mindful way .

4.      Being aware and present lessens self-judgment and increases self-compassion

5.      Giving oneself the permission to not be perfect all the time

It is vital to remember that one deserves the same warmth and affection that they easily provide others. Self-acceptance is the first step towards self-compassion and recognising oneself as only human who naturally tends to make mistakes may help one look at themselves in a kinder way.

 

References

Definition and Three Elements of Self Compassion | Kristin Neff. Self-Compassion. Retrieved 14 May 2021, from https://self-compassion.org/the-three-elements-of-self-compassion-2/.

Help, G., Professionals, F., Listed, G., Help, G., Professionals, F., & Therapist, F. et al. Self–Compassion. Goodtherapy.org. Retrieved 14 May 2021, from https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/self-compassion.

5 Steps to Develop Self-Compassion & Overcome Your Inner Critic. PositivePsychology.com. Retrieved 14 May 2021, from https://positivepsychology.com/self-compassion-5-steps/.